3.7 Nicky Have you ever sat and wondered, "Why me?"

Have you ever sat and wondered, "Why me?"

For me, growing up on a farm was a blessing. But one summer day in 1997, that blessing would turn into a curse. 

Farm life is hard work and a lot of responsibility. The early mornings and long days can make you question why you choose this lifestyle. For me, it was not a choice, but I'm glad I grew up on a farm. When you life this type of life, you learn hard work, discipline, responsibility and how to work for what you want. 

I am one of five children and was always the one that wanted to be outside helping on the farm. Everything from milking cow, bailing hay or even just feeding the barn cats. You could always find me outside doing something. I loved the farm life, but that love would soon fade one beautiful summer day. 

June 6th, 1997 is a day I will always remember, even though I wish I could forget it. As usual, I was helping my dad with chores. It was a beautiful summer day. I was having a great summer being that it was the summer before my senior year of high school. My dad was in the barn feeding the cows. I heading outside to get another wheelbarrow of feed for the cows, something I have done hundreds of times. 

I've had the same routine for years. I set the wheelbarrow next to the feeder wagon, went to the back of the tractor to turn on the wagon. I'm not sure what went wrong this time, all I knew was that in a split second, my life would change forever. 

I was 17 years old, in the prime of my life, doing what I loved. I walked to the back of the tractor, pulled the lever up, turned around and then it happened. My shirt got caught in the PTO (power take off) of the feeder wagon. The PTO is about a 4 foot long steel shaft that runs the gears on the feeder wagon, it spins very fast. The next thing I knew, my right leg was wrapped completely around the PTO. I was about to die. Somehow, by the grace of god, the tractor shut off, but the damage was already done. 

My dad came running out of the barn in a panic, my mom and my two younger sisters just happened to show up right after it happened. My parents were frantic, trying to figure out what to do as I sat there, still attached to the tractor, going into shock and bleeding profusely. 

My dad covered me with his shirt as my mom ran to the house to call an ambulance. After a few minutes, I started to loss consciousness. My mom was not going to come to the farm that day, but something told her to stop out there. Within about 20 minutes, a helicopter showed up to airlift me to the hospital. I don't remember the ride there or anything else for the next week as I was put into a medically induced coma. 

When I woke up a week later, I already knew my leg was gone. I would spend the next month in the hospital and I would have a total of 12 surgeries and a large skin graft to reconstruct what was left of my leg. I then spend the next year recovering and going through physical therapy to learn how to walk again with a prosthesis. 

The support that I received from my family and friends was amazing. There was someone with me day and night, everyday. You really never know how many great people you have in your life until something tragic happens. Without them, I know I would not have made it through that entire ordeal. 

It's been 22 years, and I still remember it like it was yesterday and I still wonder, why me? What's crazy is that most days, I don't even think about it. I still have pain almost everyday and sometimes for no reason, I replay the accident in my head as I remember everything. I will never know why that had to happen to me, but the one thing I do know is that I survived.

I wish everyday that I could be like most other people in the world. I struggle to do a lot of things that most people don't think twice about like walking more then a few blocks, or hiking in the woods. Of course I wish this never happened to me, but in a way, I feel like it has made me the strong, determined women I am today. Going through what I went through really makes you put life in perspective and you learn real quickly not to take even one minuet in life for granted.